The last week I’ve had 2 dental appointments, and for anyone who has to deal with the medical profession on an ongoing basis, there is often much trauma, anticipation, fear, and “Vulnerability Exhaustion” involved. So I decided to garner a little bit more control and security than usual for this first appointment of the new year, and I dressed for the occasion!
I took the time to prepare well and I’m so glad I did. Dressing up for doctors or specialists was the last thing on my mind, but dressing for my comfort and safety is a different thing altogether. I made the following list the night before so that I didn’t have to plan it all as I was rushing out the door (I was reminded of what a good idea this was as I found myself with only one sock on). It’s easy to underestimate how frazzled we are in the moment.
1: Dressing for personal space & dignity:
(clothes with windows)
I tend to wear “stretchy” when it comes to anything to do with doctors and tests and so on. But believe it or not, stretchy sleeves don’t always pull up high enough for blood tests and BP readings. I’ve therefore sometimes had to remove my whole shirt for these simple procedures which are often done in places where there are a lot of people around. I felt very exposed and embarrassed, which added to my already rising anxiety and lack of safety.
The same applies to the legs. Jeans rarely ride higher than a few inches, whereas stretchy pants can often pull way up past the knee. Stretchy as well as skinny, however, does not. Exposing my underwear and all the bits that try to jump out of them are not helpful to knee specialists and physios, and leave me with a level of discomfort that I don’t need on top of everything else. I’d really rather not take my whole pants off!
- I check the stretchiness in advance if I’ll be relying on it for windows.
- Cardigans are the ultimate in clothes with windows, they can be left wide open to cool down, taken off in a flash, and wrapped around for warmth.
- Socks with footless tights become windows instead of full tights which need to be removed in full (along with whatever is over them!).
- While buttons provide great windows, they can also be complicated and slow when changing. They also require a bit of thinking as you can do the wrong ones up without noticing! Press studs and zippers or wraparounds are great alternatives.
- A button-up shirt can mean exposing only a small part of me, but the same shirt, however, under different tests and circumstances can also pop open and reveal bits I’d rather not show. I want to pick my windows!
- For the same reason, I don’t want shirts that pop open or ride up (or down), therefore, I’m usually a little more generous with the amount of fabric in my clothing than I might otherwise be.
2: Watch the head!
This is probably the worst area for me and the space in which I have struggled the most! Whether it’s in a cubicle before a test, sitting in my GP’s office, or waiting in a long and public hall in a hospital, there is nothing that makes me feel more bedraggled and out of control than a shirt that needed to come off over my head! My glasses have got stuck, flung off, and bent… my hair has become static and flyaway, ponytails have come out, earrings have become hooked, lipstick can smudge, phones fall out of pockets, I have become disorientated and dizzy, and I have even hurt myself bumping into the wall or a chair I didn’t know was there. The list of things that can go wrong is endless, and while they are usually not earth-shattering, they can go a long way to feeling dreadful when you are already feeling very fragile or weepy.
They don’t help us to feel like we are being taken seriously either. It makes a difference to me when I can look a doctor in the eye as I’m talking and removing my clothing at the same time. Try feeling like you are being taken seriously when talking through an upside-down shirt covering your face! It can be thoroughly dishevelling, and difficult to walk out with the same dignity with which I walked in! … I FEEL more vulnerable and exposed when and after removing clothes over my head than anything else.
- It sounds crazy, but if the best option for me is something that needs to be taken on and off over my head, then a practice run is always the way to go. Making sure I know the shirt, pick something with a neck that stretches far, and knowing that I can whip it on and off easily and quickly is a game changer.
- Again, if it has to come over the head, then I always avoid necks with buttons and zips.
- We will discuss jewellery separately, but if going with the over-the-head option then necklaces and earrings become a massive catch point and need to be left at home.
Next up… dressing for the cold, which underwear to choose, clothes and hospital and anxiety, packing your bags and much more!
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