Cross Roads!

img_9244-1It’s been too long. I had no idea how long in fact, that I’ve been away from this beloved blog, this voice that helps me get through so much of my life, and I apologize for my absence. Thanks to all of you who have stayed and not unfollowed in the meantime. It has been about 6 weeks, and I feel like I have been on a massive journey that I am still on in many ways. But I see some light at the end of the tunnel (and pray it isn’t a train!). I don’t want this to be too long and boring, so I’ll keep it short then hopefully go into more detail as and when needed, over the next few months.

  1. I’ve been away. It is winter here in the southern hemisphere, so we are all hunched down in front of fire places and heaters rather than galavanting around the countryside, but July is also one of three birthday chunks in our family, and a big meeting time for my other half. So I have only spent 6 nights in my own bed since the middle of June but I have been far and wide, caught up with special people, and celebrated birthdays in London, Oxfordshire, Perth (Australia) and Gosford (also in Australia). So it’s been hotels, couches, and 7 different beds… no wonder I am behind on so many things!
  2. I’ve pushed myself a bit hard and so my pain levels have been a little worse than usual, although winter is usually worse than summer anyway. So I have been very sore and wallowing a little …
  3. I’ve been reevaluating my writing and my online presence and while I’m not quite there yet, I am making some progress with finding a space that is less taxing but more permanent. I am reminded how much I love writing and blogging and I must be careful not to lose this …
  4. I’ve seen a new specialist and have a new diagnosis on top of the old one. Fibromyalgia seems to be part of the problem, and while I’m not 100% convinced yet, I suspect that I am in denial and don’t want another diagnosis.
  5. I turned fifty! It hasn’t really changed anything but I have felt loved and I think for anyone, the half way mark is a time of reflection and re-evaluation so here I am!
  6. I think I’m stressed because I am behind on almost everything, including newsletters and writing, so hopefully August is going to be a time of refreshing and catch up!
  7. I have given in to pressure and am about to start my own Youtube channel, which will mean back into the Facebook Live events as well …

Thanks as always and I look forward to unpacking those a little over the next few weeks ๐Ÿ™‚

The Writing Side of Me:

img_0363-1As you know, there is more to me than just Mah Eeds and that I love to write and share my story. I love it, and I never take for granted that I have been given this outlet! But I also sometimes find it all quite overwhelming, as though if I had started writing years ago then I might be all caught up by now and that I am always behind. But I didn’t and I don’t seem to be able to find the time nor the spoons to get it all written down before the next thingย happens. But this blog was my first, my followers here are those who took a chance on me before I ever published anything else, and when I am feeling overwhelmedย by the world, this is my safe place. I feel that I am able to be the girl with the broken body without feeling that I need to apologize, be professional, wear a mask, beat a deadline, or write the right things!

Spreading my wings has been wonderful. I now guest blog in a few other places and as you know I even launched my first book a couple of weeks ago. It has sold over 2,000 copies since then and still going strong! People are asking me to speak at various places, and while I am happy to do that and excited that people are getting so much out of my little book, I am also keenly aware that I need to keep pacing myself and watching my spoons. I am not a marketer or a sales person and I am not comfortable tooting my own horn. But in order to get myself out there and do something decent with this book then I have to.

I am enjoying Twitter and meeting new people there, but it is also a fast-paced and fickle place and people dump you very quickly if you don’t do what they want you to do. It feels to me like a huge hall where everyone is shouting to be louder than the next person. That is not a comfortable space for me.

But this spaceย is a comfortable space for me and I love writing here. I am behind on everything, having spent the last 2 weeks launching the book, traveling overseas, running a wedding, and flying home again at 4 am yesterday. So this will be a whole week in bed or by the fire (other than Dr appointments) recovering and recharging and I really hope that that also includes loads of proper catching up with my online world. It is good to be here again ๐Ÿ™‚ xxxx